When Bobby and I were in the first few years of our relationship, there was a time we weren't "together". We were broken up, but we saw each other ALL the time. God was working on us. I had a huge lesson to learn about forgiveness, and he was realizing that I did not hang the sun and the moon. (A lesson I have been trying to reteach ever since ;) ) I woke up one morning and was praying about our relationship, which I had been doing daily, and heard in my spirit that it was time to get back together. I realized it was Valentine's Day and laughed at the irony...we didn't keep it back then either, but I went out, bought a card and a gift, and tracked him down at work. God is so amazing in His care for the minuscule details of our lives...Bobby had bought me something as well. We put our rocky breakup in our past and looked eagerly to the future, an engagement, marriage, and our life.
You would think this would have become a day we honored...but we didn't. We still count September 25, 1995, as our "Anniversary of Meeting". Even if the license says otherwise, we celebrate March 21, 1998, as our wedding day. As our children became aware of other holidays, the ones that shout from the checkout line buy all this candy, you know...Valentine's, Easter, Halloween, and Christmas. They asked about it, and we told them it wasn't the kind of love God wants us to celebrate lightly.
The love on Valentine's flirts with the erotic love we are only to have for one person, our spouse. We have been teaching our children to protect their hearts, limit themselves, not crush over every cute face, and hold on to their love till the right time, the right person. We don't want them to play around with love, no girlfriends in kindergarten, no crushes in junior high, no dating in high school. Since Valentine's has no (IMO) redeeming qualities, we ignore it. My husband doesn't bring home flowers and chocolate...he brings me gifts throughout the year because he wants to, not because he "has to". We don't hand out Valentine's in church or attend home school parties with themed play dates.
But we still love you; Our kids have had good friends that they have loved. Loved so hard that even today, years later, they will be moved to tears over missing them. Our kids practice selfless love, giving of themselves when nothing will come back. But we don't play with love, we don't call it cute, we don't court it when we aren't ready for it.